Spring has come late to Fife this year, but I do think we’re all the better for it. One appreciates so much more these spriteful spring days after a longer dark season, though in all honesty I already partly miss the many snowy days we enjoyed in St Andrews this winter. How splendid it is to warm oneself by the fire on a cold winter’s day, with a cup of coffee or a pint of ale and some Washington Irving to read. None of that today, however!
Quite a decent day, really. The eleven o’clock Mass saw a good friend received into the Church, followed by her Confirmation along with another friend of mine. After the post-Mass tea and coffee, myself, young McMorrin, Tom Howard, Adrian, Miss Brennan, Michelle, and Miss Dempsey got sandwiches from Cherries and enjoyed the sun-soaked ruins of the Cathedral cloister. I had a delicious honey mustard chicken and stuffing brown-bread baguette, splendidly washed down with a bottle of Old Speckled Hen.
When it comes to favourite beers, the Hen suggests itself as an obvious candidate. Quite accurately advertising itself as a ‘strong fine ale’, Old Speckled Hen’s robust and flavourful taste is perfect when accompanied by a good sandwich (most especially roast ham in my experience). It has been an important part of many a much-enjoyed luncheon here in St Andrews and I do hope I will be able to find it in New York after my triumphant return this June.
After our motley band completed our luncheon, a post-prandial piggy-back cloister race simply erupted. Adrian took an early lead with young Jamie on his back, followed by Miss Dempsey with Michelle. Tom Howard, with friend atop, suffered a late start but quickly swallowed the rear, overtook Miss Dempsey, engaged in a brief kerfuffle with Mr. Moore and swept to victory with a good many lengths to spare. Good man, Tom! Having cleaned up our mess, we gently sauntered back to Canmore along the cliff-side path, stealing an occasional gaze into the broad North Sea which lay before us. I finagled Jamie out of writing an essay (too pretty a day to spend on mere academe!) to continue our saunter on the West Sands, where we made a good many new canine friends and, strangely enough, chanced upon what appeared to be the insect-ridden severed head of a dead deer. Very strange, we thought, very strange.
The fine day wrapped up with a showing of an episode of the animated Adventures of Tintin in the wardenial apartment of Canmore, followed by an Inspector Morse. The Tintin was ‘King Ottokar’s Sceptre’, in which the intrepid reporter saves the ritualistic traditional monarchy of Syldavia from being overthrown by evil totalitarian modernists. The best scene in the printed version (seen below), and likewise the animation, is when the King rewards Tintin’s bravery by awarding him Syldavia’s highest honour, the Order of the Gold Pelican. When I was younger, these scenes always made me want to visit the Kingdom of Syldavia, but alas it exists only in the mind of Hergé, its creator.
I have been able to buy Old Speckled Hen in Brooklyn very easily.
Indeed, not to worry, it can be found all over NY, even in Westchester. That should ease your re-entry quite a lot, I would hope.
Old Speckled Hen? Yecch. It’s the Miller Genuine of UK Ales (next to Bishop’s Finger). Old Speckled Hen has a terrific label but it’s contents are a disappointment. Now, when you come home seek out the fine Upper State New York Brewery, Saranac. They make ale that Donne, Shakespeare, and Fielding would have admired. Also, SmuttyNose of New Hampshire is superb. Try also some of the Maryland brewers’ fares. You will be setting up house in the land of trustfund brewers. Avail yourself of them, rather than the commercially-made UK stuff. Speckled Hen makes a decent Black and Tan but Bass is better. Smithwick’s is decent and a few of Samuel Smith’s are good – some are bitter and they’re not bitters.
Andrew, When exactly is your triumphant return? I am thinking that Mrs C and I may wish to time a visit to my niece to coincide with the happy event.
Is Fiendish planning a bash at the NYAC?
Mrs. P, you’ve gone mad. Old Speckled Hen don’t do a Black and Tan. Crikey, I bet Marupa has better taste in ale than you! I do like Saranac’s dark beers though. I despise light-coloured beers in all their incarnations; Lager is evil! I do enjoy a good pint of Smithwick’s though.
Herr Cardinal, my triumphant return will be on 24.VI.2006. If you can manage to stash the P’s in your overheard compartment I am sure Fiendish can be induced to buy a round. If not, we’ll expose his family’s business dealing with Red China.
Andrew, I am pleased to see that there is someone other than myself who still refers to that commie country as Red China.
On the subject of alcoholic beverages, you should tell Mrs P to put her own house in order before offering advice to you. Mr P regularly drinks cheap bourbon and Diet Coke. If that’s not right out of a spring break bar in Fort Lauderdale I don’t know what is.
BTW, exactly how many chickens are harmed during the imbibing of Speckled Hen?
You, me, and the New York Sun.
I see that I am a bit late to this particular commentators party. Yes, we should do something in June to celebrate the return of our scholar from Scotland, and the NYAC would be a reasonable venue. If we can get the Ps to join us, I am sure the AC would be prepared to stock up on cheap burbon for the occasion–and I know I have seen people getting Diet Cokes there from time to time.
No, not the NYAC. I want to go to all the places the Card and Fiendish have been tossed out of.
My dear Mrs P, that could prove both expensive and embarrassing.
Fiendish: I was just kidding around. But we could all go to some venue of local interest in Manhattan and have a nice time tipping a few and celebrating Andrew’s ‘triumphant return.’
Sincerely,
The Andrew Cusack Triumphant Return Home Committee
What? The Andrew Cusack Triumphant Return Home Committee is concerned about money? Has his position in society already slipped? Not good for his marriage prospects. Not good at all.
No, no, Mrs P. You miss the point. Since no one is concerned about money and everyone would like the opportunity to equally lavish their largesse upon young Andrew, I was merely suggesting that Fiendish might prefer an open venue to a closed one. That way you’d be able to spend all your heart desires on Andrew. Of course, the matter is entirely up to Mr. Lout and Mr. Cusack.
Sincerely,
The Andrew Cusack Triumphant Return Committee
P.S. And as long as you’ve brought the matter up, the Committee will be looking for what I’m certain will be a very handsome subscription from you and Mr P toward the Triumphant Return’s coffers.
A party at the beachclub with young ladies in white dresses?
Sorry, that should have been signed…
The Andrew Cusack Triumphant Return Home Committee
And NOT: The Andrew Cusack Triumphant Return Committee which is a separate organization being chaired by representatives of Westchester County. Again, my apologies.
Why don’t we just take a page out of your life and send him off on the QEII with a bevy of Sweet Briar girls? We could meet for drinks in his cabin before he sets sail?
Sounds great. Bring your check book.
The Andrew Cusack Triumphant Return Home Committee
I’ll bring my mother’s. You need WD40 to open Mr. P’s
I assume TACTRHC is fully aware that large quantities of Diet Coke and cheap bourbon are an essential part of the triumphant planning process?
it is not acquarious.